The Glamorous Grind
The Glamorous Grind is where bold legal minds meet unfiltered conversations. Join hosts Ilona Antonyan and Mila Arutunian—powerhouse attorneys at Antonyan Miranda—for this dynamic podcast as they dive into headline-making lawsuits, past cases, and the hustle of balancing career, family, and ambition. With fascinating guests, including celebrities, business leaders, and former clients, Ilona and Mila keep it raw, real, and always glamorous.
The Glamorous Grind
Fresh Starts & New Beginnings: Artem's Story Part 1
Discover the captivating journey of Artem Chigvintsev, a Dancing with the Stars champion and Emmy-nominated performer, as he shares his remarkable story from Izhevsk, Russia to the bright lights of American television. Listen to Artem reveal the unexpected twists and turns that brought him to the U.S., launching him into a career filled with both triumphs and trials. He discusses the fascinating blend of teaching, choreography, and the relationship-building that fuels his success, and how personal experiences like public divorce and fatherhood have reshaped his outlook on life and empathy.
Join us as we explore personal transformation through life's challenges, from navigating the complexities of divorce and co-parenting to understanding the emotional toll of public perception and false accusations. Artem opens up about the bittersweet path to closure after a long relationship, highlighting the often overlooked emotional impacts on men. We tackle misconceptions about marriage, discuss the rewards of having a large family, and consider how venturing into new endeavors can offer unexpected personal growth and fulfillment. This conversation promises to leave you with a deeper understanding of resilience and the power of transformation in the face of adversity.
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Welcome to the Glamorous Grind where grit meets glamour. I'm Ilona Antonian.
Mila:And I'm Mila Aratunian.
Ilona:We are lawyers by trade, friends by bait and your guides to the world of legal drama Each week we're going to tell you about our most unforgettable cases and share how we balance hustle and ambition with a bit of style.
Mila:So whether you're a legal eagle chasing your dreams or just here for the scandalous stories, settle in with your favorite drink.
Ilona:Because we are bringing you wisdom, wit and a whole lot of interesting stuff.
Mila:It's law, it's life, it's the Glamorous Grind.
Ilona:Today's episode is extra special because it's part one of a very exciting two-part interview with an absolute superstar on and off the dance floor.
Mila:He's a Dancing with the Stars champion, an Emmy-nominated performer and someone who knows a thing or two about glitz and glamour, especially while grinding towards your dreams. That's right, it's Artem Chigvintsev. We met up with him at his home turf and talked about everything from navigating the dance floor to navigating the complexities of life offstage.
Ilona:We discussed his dance career, what it was like growing up in former Soviet Union, family life, fatherhood and going through a divorce in the public eye.
Mila:After, keeping everything low-key for a while. Artem is ready to tell his fans how he's doing.
Ilona:Divorce is never simple. It's complicated, no matter how long you've been married, and it takes a toll. It changes who you are and you have to often rediscover who you are.
Mila:We had an incredible conversation and are so excited to share his story with you.
Ilona:Artem, thank you for coming to our show.
Artem:First of all, thank you for inviting me.
Ilona:Tell us about how you came to America.
Artem:It's all because of my dancing career, to be fair, because I came here for a friend's wedding. At the time I was looking for a dance partner and the dance world is kind of actually small. People think it's like this ginormous place. But at the time you kind of know who is the top 25 dancers out there in the world and you're looking for the best match. And then I found a dance partner. It worked out.
Ilona:So that's my story.
Artem:I come from a small town called Izhevsk. It's in Ural. It's a small town for Russia, but it's not actually that small if you consider how many people live there.
Ilona:Did you ever think when you were a kid, or dream about being a celebrity dancer?
Artem:Being even on TV, was never even thought. My dance partner at the time wanted to audition for so you Think you Can Dance. She got this email saying producers of American Idol creating a new show on Fox called so you Think you Can Dance, and we're looking for different styles of dances, different genres of dances. She told me like hey, do you want to audition with me? And I said where is it going to be? And she's like, oh, it's going to be in Los Angeles. I'm like, oh, I've never been to LA, I'm going to go out. And then pretty much she didn't make the show, but they offered me to go on the show and that's how I ended up on TV.
Ilona:What was your reaction when you learned that you're going to be on television dancing?
Artem:I think because I was always a competitive dancer. For me it meant more to be like the best at my craft versus like, oh, I got on TV and I can use this opportunity to gain something from it. You know, it never really came across in my mind. What I was excited actually about is to, for the first time, being exposed not just to ballroom dancing but to be exposed to all different genres of dancing which I was not great at. It was like a breaking point where I truly started appreciating the craft of being on Dancing with the Stars.
Artem:We have to teach someone. It's a kind of unique skill to have because it's not just about being a good dancer, it's not just about being a good choreographer, it's not just about being a teacher trying to get along with somebody in the room who you go through laughter, tears and struggles. So it's like if you're combining all of these aspects to one bowl, like that's what kind of gives you to be in a position being a dancer and dancing with the stars. It's not just a one skill, you have to accumulate all of them.
Ilona:Do you think you could teach children and choreograph them, or do you prefer to deal more with grownups?
Artem:I used to teach kids. I used to have competitive couples back in the day when I was competing myself. I probably would have done way better job teaching kids than when I used to back in the day, because when you're teaching kids when you're young, you're more perfect for them. I think now I would take a different approach. Even though I love teaching adults, I think it's better just because it's easy to communicate With kids. You have to be very, very careful because they take any criticism to a certain way that can affect their life completely. People don't get enough praise like teachers who educate kids, like how important they are in shaping anyone's life.
Mila:Hearing you speak, it sounds like something that's coming from a parent, would you say. Becoming a dad has shifted your perspective on how to teach kids and how kids feel and empathize with them I mean definitely having a kid.
Artem:Um, it teaches you a lot of things. I think having a kid mainly teaches who you are than anything else, because then you're like realizing a lot of things about yourself that oh, I never thought of that. Yeah, being a dad is very special it's a huge responsibility very special, huge responsibility it's. It's the hardest thing you'll ever do absolutely it's the hardest thing you'll ever do, but I love it what do you love about being father?
Artem:everything, I mean everything I it's. It's not so much about being a father, it's being being a parent Like from his four.
Ilona:He's super cute.
Artem:I think right now it's a bit more like being a parent, like experiencing being a parent. I took him fishing a few times. I don't think he's on stage even like kind of he loves it. He definitely is excited about it. But my bond with my dad was over that because he loves fishing and I feel like whenever I went on a trip with him that was my bonding time, you know, and I get to know my dad and I kind of like we share the experience together. I don't think I have that yet with my son, just because he's just too young.
Ilona:I mean you currently have 50-50 custody of Mateo. What is your normal daily routine like being a single dad?
Artem:What is normally Wake up, cook him breakfast, get him dressed to school, pack him lunch, cook him lunch, drive him to school, pick him up from school, talk about his day. Let's go to playground. He loves hot air balloons. Like he's just obsessed with hot air balloons. Like he's just obsessed with hot air balloons. Luckily enough, from where I live, we can see hot air balloons go up in the air pretty much like three days of the week.
Ilona:And your mom recently came to United States, right?
Artem:Yes, that was a kind of long process, so they kind of wanted to visit for a while and then obviously they can, because they have a Russian citizenship and Russians are not allowed to United States without a visa.
Mila:So does Mateo love having his grandma here.
Artem:Look, my mom is so helpful with everything that's happening and he loves it. They constantly play hide and seek, like he loves that game and he always wants to be in grandma's bed. I don't know what's about it, but he's just obsessed with like laying there and just playing games and he loves it, yeah.
Mila:You know, in the Eastern European culture grandparents help, so so much. My grandma basically raised me while my mom worked, and I think it's so important for kids to see.
Artem:It's definitely, I think, something that people might not understand. My grandma played a huge influence as well in my life and I feel like the wisdom of theirs is so important and you might not understand when you're younger, but when you, you know, becoming an adult yourself and a parent yourself, you really understand what that means and I'm just pleased that actually my son can experience that I know you like to cook for mateo, but um does your mom make a lot of soups, like you know.
Artem:Russian mom actually she's pretty much a chef. She's only, she's in the kitchen all day long, which is I'm telling her, like mom, you don't have to do any of that stuff like I can figure it out. I mean, I've been doing that for a long time, mind you, so I haven't lived with my parents longer than I lived with them.
Ilona:Wow, how old were you when you left your parental home? When I left.
Artem:I was probably about 15.
Ilona:Oh, wow.
Artem:But my mom is, and she's, you know, 70. So coming to United States, it is a bit of a shock because everything is different, you know, the food is different, people are different. She's still kind of amazed the fact that when she goes for walks, like people say hi to her in a way, when she passes them and the first, like they don't know me, like why would they say hi?
Mila:Because in truth, I think in every other country in the world that I've experienced living, in like that's not very normal and that goes back to like the eastern european culture, like we're so honest and so real and a lot of people in america don't understand it, because the culture here is always be nice, no matter what, always have a smile on and I don't.
Artem:Obviously there's no right and wrong. I mean how you grow up, and that's how you grew up, and that's what you think is normal, right? I?
Mila:think, as a parent, that's like one of the greatest challenges is letting your kids be who they are, pursue their passion. I mean, I have three kids and my oldest is eight and he always has these new, different passions and I want to let him pursue them and encourage them, but I'm also also like you kind of need to focus on your education, and you still have to be a parent you know like it's.
Artem:It's a fine line where you do I need to let them, or do I need to steer them in a different direction or explain? It might be not the best you know, and this is the thing with parenting, like it's now black and white do you want to have more kids in the future?
Artem:I mean mean I'd love to have one more. My parents happily married for 50 years. They had the golden wedding and all that stuff and they played huge influence in my life. What family is how it should be, and I don't know. It's tough to watch and to see myself being what I am because everything in my body says otherwise.
Ilona:Moving on to that subject, I guess when you got married you thought it's forever. But I'm a divorce attorney and everybody has those intentions. And then things go wrong in life and at the end, when you go through a divorce, often you're divorcing not the person you fell in love with, but someone different. And at the end, when you go through divorce, often you're divorcing not the person you fell in love with, but someone different. And in your situation I know because you're very committed, just from what you've shared in your court records and in general. You stuck through a lot because you wanted to save the marriage and you wanted to raise your son. I think you look way more balanced and have more life in your eyes now than you did a while back last year. I can see it.
Artem:You feel very balanced I mean I think divorce was just one of the things that I was facing at the time. I mean there was a criminal charge. I was cut off from every single outlet of support, except for maybe my parents. Like I was cut off from every angle. Like sometimes people go through divorce but they have their job, they have their like you know close ones and have their friends. Like there is a still certain support. You know close ones and have their friends. Like there is still certain support. Like I didn't have a family support because that was cut off. My work was cut off and then on top of it there was a criminal case.
Ilona:Well, I think it's different when you have a child and you're sharing a child because you have to deal with each other. You're always going to be a family, no matter what. You always have to make sure your son knows he's loved by both parents. Keep any conflict, any negative comments. Never put your child in the middle of that, because you know he's part of both parents, he loves everybody and you know the child has to be protected from all of that.
Artem:I think everyone knows what is best. Everyone wants to put you know like their best foot forward and, just you know, make the best for the kid and all of that. But again, it's easier said than done, you know. I think it depends what beliefs you have.
Mila:What are your beliefs? What are your values?
Artem:Well, my value is being a united family period Like that, it will never change change. I don't ever believe that kid is not going to be affected by by what happened and people say, like he's four years old, it's fine, it's like you know. He doesn't know any different.
Mila:No, I've been married 12 years and we've had our share of ups and downs and we still do Like every level has another devil.
Artem:Every year it's something new, you know you know and I think there is a little say to that that I'm a big believer as well is that, like when you meet another person and you start having a family together, your relationship is, evolves. It's not the same, and that's the one thing that I'm like. How come people don't understand that when you start dating someone, you have a different, not even just values, but you have a different energy about a different everything. You put your source of energy just in one outlet. Then you end up like marrying.
Artem:It's like you have different stages and every single stage is not the same and should not be compared to the previous stage very right and that's the part that I feel like there's such a big misunderstanding and a lot of people giving up on their relationships is because they're like, well, you used to do this or you used to do that, like.
Mila:I just don't really understand that, that that's an argument well, and then you have kids and then you have a household, and then like marriage is not happy days and sunshine and butterflies.
Artem:Marriage is like I think marriage is the hardest work you'll do it's so hard, people think you come home and they're just like ah, now I can relax and be fine. Now, if you have a kid, you cannot give as much just to one person because you have to share with a whole nother human.
Mila:And not only that. You have to wake up in the middle of the night, you have to not sleep because your baby has a stuffy nose, you have to deal with issues with teachers calling from school because your child is misbehaving, and you share in all of that together. So if you don't, if you can't share it in an effective way, it will collapse.
Ilona:But now there's conflict in any family. Like you know, like I, have five kids, four of them are one years old.
Artem:I mean five is crazy. I'm not even going to say much because I just feel it wouldn't give a shit, even guilty, to be speaking about. It's hard for me. I just don't understand how it's even doable.
Ilona:Five it's actually easier, I thought.
Artem:Absolutely. That's a lie. It's not a lie, it's easier.
Ilona:No, I thought how is that? Easier One was harder when I just had my five One-year-old? No, she's five now, but was it harder because it was the first? Yes, but now it's easier because mine are all the same age. They're going to be going to the same school, same activities.
Mila:I will say having like three kids in different stages. I will say it gets harder when they're older because they all want your attention and they're all so different and they all have their personalities and it is more difficult to like give enough to each of them. But I will say, when you have more than one, they entertain each other, they grow up and like they're also different. So like one is sensitive and you have to like be empathetic to that, the other one is like really aggressive. So that part for me is the hardest of like. Am I spending enough time with all of them? Am I empathetic enough to their own little personalities?
Artem:Do you love them all the?
Mila:same yes.
Artem:Because, you see, to me I think that would be really tough, because I know how much I love my son, which is like it like makes me tear up when saying that I just would have a really hard time.
Mila:My favorite part, though, about having multiple kids is seeing their love, seeing their relationship, and seeing how they treat each other, and to me it's just like the best part of having multiple yeah.
Ilona:Now, after what you went through last year, you went into construction, yeah, still do. And you know, I've seen your projects, do-it-yourself projects. You've been doing it for a while. How's that going?
Artem:It's going great. It pushes me into the different areas of life that I actually always wanted to do but never really had, like the kind of like a push. I love construction always have, maybe because my dad's an engineer and he in construction, I don't know, but it was always curious for me, like build something, you know, do it with your own hands. I would love to pursue this more. I think I've really learned a lot about myself in the past few months. It gives me more confidence to do what I do and it makes me feel more confident about the future with, like, maybe this is what I really want to pursue next.
Mila:Here's my thought from and I don't know you very well we just met today but from everything I've seen and heard and from speaking to you, you seem like a very passionate person. It seems like when you love something, you will put everything into it.
Artem:Yeah.
Mila:And then you will become amazing at it, and there's nothing you can't accomplish if you learn to love it.
Artem:If it comes from the right place. I believe so. Yes, If there's a passion about it, if there's an interest to it, and I feel that's something that I haven't learned or that's something that I wasn't exposed to growing up, and it's sad that it's kind of like I realized that to the fullest at this stage of my life. I have to be also grateful that I have because be also grateful that I have because it's great that I have You're so young still.
Mila:You have everything ahead of you.
Artem:Yeah, it's tough to believe at the moment, you know, I kind of like still gasp certain thoughts in my mind, like did I live my best life already, you know? And now I'm just trying to make the most of what it's here, and I think that's that's the struggle I think I'm going through right now is to like kind of like where, where, like where actually I'm at there's no time like the present and again this is not the belief. Live in the present, make the most of it, and I think it's beautiful too.
Ilona:When you're married, you have your joint identity. You have certain lifestyle. You develop and now, being fresh out of a divorce, you have to find out who you are, what's your identity, what's coming being a single dad and trying to work through co-parenting while everything is still fresh? Meanwhile, we're also still, you know, faced with the consequences of the mugshot that was on the internet back in August. How did that impact you when that mugshot went viral before there was a legal determination of who was truly at fault?
Artem:Maybe because I've been on TV. It's like you being judged by the media before anything. I think with the mugshot, the first time it really hit me First of all, I mean it hit me just even being in the police station being arrested. You're watching this on TV, like in TV shows when people are getting arrested and all that stuff, but experiencing yourself it's um, you're just in a huge denial. It's like, is this really happening, like what is happening? But going back to the mugshot, I remember being in Target and I was buying, I think, um, some stuff, probably for Matteo Cause that's most of the time I go Target for buying stuff for Mateo and seeing I think it was a Star magazine or something and that was on the cover my mugshot was on the cover of Star magazine and you can help yourself. But when people seeing that mugshot on that thing and then watching it you like for them in their mind, you are immediately guilty.
Ilona:You're a criminal in their mind.
Artem:There is nothing you can say or try to justify yourself and change their minds. When person have a mugshot, you're guilty immediately. There is not even a question of like what happened, like it's weird because in this country I thought you're guilty. When you've proven that you're guilty, or you're innocent until proven guilty.
Artem:Exactly that was not the case whatsoever. Everything happened. There was a paparazzi outside of when I was coming out of the jail, when I was there for a few hours, like there was already paparazzi standing outside taking shot. I was like how? Like what is going on?
Mila:I will say that what I've noticed is there's a lot of emphasis put on the trauma that women face when it comes to divorce, but there's not a lot of emphasis put and it's highly undervalued the trauma that men face. And it happens so often that men are accused of things and it's traumatic.
Artem:I think we have this certain stigma to have this, I don't know, just like immediate accusation, immediate. It's like when people say don't judge book by its cover, but we always do. It sucks. I mean, I definitely wish that was not the case, and going through myself like it's, you just feel bad.
Ilona:It's kind of like an out-of-body experience for you because you never pictured it everything.
Artem:For me it completely, ruined everything for me From every angle. It ruined my life completely and the worst part about all of this, because DA dropped the case, clearly stating that there was nothing that they could possibly have charged me on.
Ilona:I think I want to clarify that.
Artem:In know, in a criminal case they must have sufficient evidence to prove beyond reasonable doubt that you know there was any domestic violence perpetrated by you, which, and also and also one another thing to add on to it from my understanding as well, like other party, did not have to press charges against you because I think in California law that the state take upon themselves to get that case.
Ilona:Well, you were told when you, at the time of the arrest right, that one of you must be arrested.
Artem:One of you must be arrested.
Ilona:Yes, and then eventually, I mean family court has a different standard. You know, the standard in family court is what's more likely than not. It's like preponderance of evidence. Is it more likely or not that you've done something wrong to deserve restraining order against you or did she do something wrong to deserve restraining order against her? And you know you've submitted sufficient evidence explaining what actually happened and you obtained evidence in your divorce and restraining order proceeding to support what you were claiming to be the truth in your case. And you know, ultimately in family court you both obtained restraining orders against each other and eventually, in November, everything was settled and you both just let it go. Why did you decide to just not go through the trial and present everything, but instead, you know, get it done. Why is that important for you? Because I want it to be over. You know, get it done. Why is that?
Artem:important for you Because I want it to be over. I felt, for me personally, like I needed to go back to live my life, you know, and just I needed to move on emotionally, financially.
Ilona:And I just want my life to be normal again. Did that, you know? Signing the final resolution of the case in November, do you feel like that helped you move on to the next healing stage?
Artem:You know the Zook closure is something that's been going on for seven years. You know it's a seven years of relationship Like it's not just like people keep forgetting something that I didn't stop loving person that day and I just moved on. You know, like it's, it wasn't my decision to get divorced, so I was, till the last moment, was like maybe we should do therapy, maybe we need to try to figure something out. My ideal scenario is like keeping the family together, united. It was a huge closure of seven years.
Artem:I will never forget this moment when mateo loved three of us being together. I mean, he's he's like you can see that his excitement when it's like whether I was holding material, my wife was holding material and he's like want us to kiss in front of him. Like he's so, like it makes him so happy and even having thought of that, like this, this is never gonna be that ever again. Like this is like you need to put, like you need to move on. And I think that closure was a huge like, because I remember like flying from the airport and I was like, wow, this is just like. It was sad, but it also like was, I guess, relief because it was done. That is going to be no more, because I mean it was dramatic. Like this whole thing was maybe dramatic, not the right word but it was like it was draining. I mean it was relief from maybe, like a legal point of view, legal stance and I'd finally be able to have Mateo, like there was a closure in seven years of my life, everyday life.
Mila:I can imagine how difficult it must have been with getting a restraining order against someone you spent seven years with and had a baby with and raised a baby with.
Artem:Not seeing Mateo for three and a half weeks, not even seeing him, not talking to him, because I were not allowed.
Mila:That's heartbreaking.
Artem:When you don't see your son because it's your choice. It's a one thing when you don't see your son because it's someone else's choice and you actually legally cannot do it. That's where it gets. Like I'm helpless over here, like I want to see my son, and rightly so. I want to see my son there. Absolutely should not have been a reason for not to see my son, for not to see my son, except for legally.
Ilona:In California anyone can go file a restraining order over the counter without giving notice to the other side. In other counties, like Napa, you do have to give notice, but in your case you didn't get notice because a special request was made to not give notice. So you had no idea that your rights to see your son were being taken away until you'd have your day in court weeks later, and then at that point we were able to get you 50% custody.
Artem:And also not mentioning that. And that was done when I already had visitations with Mateo. So it's like I'm seeing Mateo and all of a sudden one day it's like, oh no, you can't see him anymore. That was tough.
Ilona:Was that one of your worst experiences in your?
Artem:lifetime Hands down, hands down, just simply because I couldn't do anything about it. It's like you've just been put in front of the situation where this is it.
Mila:That brings us to the end of another episode of the Glamorous Grind.
Ilona:Don't miss part two, and don't forget to subscribe, leave us a review and follow us on social media. We hope you enjoyed hearing from Artyom. His story is truly one of resilience, reinvention and staying graceful even through life's unexpected turns.
Mila:Absolutely. We loved hearing about his journey and we cannot wait to share part two with you next week. And, as always, stay bold, stay glamorous and keep grinding. See you soon on the Glamorous Grind.
